I remember the days when I thought out summer vacations lasted forever. The warm days seemed to stretch on and I was always totally ready to go back to school.
As we all know, as you get older, life seems to start flying by. That is until you have a shitty year, then it never seems to end.
But it did. It finally ended. Not a moment too soon, either. If last year would have dragged on a minute longer who knows what might have happened. Just when I thought it was over, Meghan’s mom died. I know I didn’t know her mom, but that didn’t lessen the grief I felt for Meghan. My heart broke for her and her sisters knowing what a loss it would be for them.
Louisa and I went to the memorial service this weekend. It was a tad strange, since we didn’t know her. All of our grief was for our friend. I realized I hadn’t been to a funeral since Great-Grandma Gonzales died my Senior year of High School. I don’t remember it. However, that was not the most recent death in my life.
It was a little over 4 years ago that Jim died. There wasn’t a funeral. I don’t remember the . . . . get together (?) we had for him. I remember putting the pictures together for it. I don’t remember the actual event. More than anything, I remember Dawn, Mary Jane and maybe Doug sitting around Dawn’s kitchen. We told Jim stories and made horribly inappropriate jokes. Jokes Jim would have loved.
Jim was cremated. I have some of Jim. So do some other people. We take Jim on special trips with us-like last year when we went to San Francisco, I brought Jim and we let some go off of the Golden Gate Bridge. It feels right. Having him there. Remembering him that way. I am often sitting on my couch and can see the spot where I keep him and just feel so good.
Is it morbid that my first post of the New Year is about death?
I know I have said it somewhere here before (I am too lazy to find where), but I when I die-I want my friends and family to be laughing. I mean, OK, I get-people are going to cry. But think of ME , the dead one. Think of how BORED I would be if we were all sitting around crying. Think of how badly I would want to say something inappropriate. Think of how much I would make fun of you for dressing up. I don’t want a funeral. I want to be cremated. I want my ashes brought all over the world. I want you to sit around, eat Red Robin and drink Liquid Sun. I want you to tell my Dad about the time Snickers licked my nipple at Rock Bottom (Oh wait, Michael already DID). Tell my Mom that in High School, at least 7 people lost their virginity in her bed. Nothing is taboo! I’m dead! I can’t get mad at you anymore! Ha!
I don’t think I have a point. What’s new?
I am excited for 2009. I didn’t make any resolutions. I never do. If I want to do something, I’ll just do it. We’ll see how that all pans out.
Random pic:
i hope you have the best year ever my leano, that would be so excellent, and don’t worry i will tell mom and dad everything, but thats only if you die first lol.
I was laughing and crying while reading this. Jeni I don’t want to think about your death. But in true Jeni fashion you will go out with a bang! I will provide the Red Robin minus the melon. I love you!
The mexican was eating a taco when I read the “Snickers” comment. I started choking I was laughing so hard! One of my very favorite memories, that and when you peed the bed on my 40th bday : ) oh wait you aren’t dead yet sorry!
Hey now.
Someone had to pee the bed on your 40th. It might as well have been me.