Since I’m home sick, I need something to read. As I was perusing my shelves, my old high school yearbooks caught my eye. One of them, from my sophomore year, was STUFFED with papers. I pulled it down to see what they all were and I started reading through all the things people wrote in my year book that year. I came to the conclusion that 1) people thought I was weird, but in a good way (I was) and 2) I talked about sex. A LOT. That’s not surprising either since that’s when I started having sex.

I decided that transcribing some of these messages from my yearbook for you would be hilarious (at least to me) and insightful. I have added a few editors notes. But if there is no explanation, it’s cause I can’t remember that inside joke.

“Hey there Jeni (Flash) [Flash was my nickname. Cause I flashed people]! How them tits  hangin’? [see]  It’s been great having you as a bestest friend! Keep Flashing people!!! Get Drunk, Get High, Get Naked!!! [Our motto. As you can see, not much has changed] Love, Lisa”

“Jeni, I like to smack your ass, Miguel” [I have no idea who Miguel is]

“Jeni, Hi, It’s the Jolly Green Giant. Well, I believe you have contaminated my poor mind numerous times this year, but I’ll live-I hope. Anyways, don’t go posting your bra in too many places, k? Talk to you later, Miriam”

“A strange, but cool chick, I don’t know what’s up with you and the clippings from some one’s knob, but whatever quivers your liver babe. Have fun taking porno pictures and get really ripped this summer. Call me sometime xxx-xxxx. Miss World”

“Jeni you sexy girl, I will never forget the good sex we had, the tantalizing foreplay with whip cream, strawberry’s and chocolate syrup and those ice cold ice cubes running down the center of my back. I’ll never forget those fantasies we discussed between the two of us talking about our most desirable places we wanted to be touched at. Are you having an orgasm yet, because if not I have no problem telling you about my experiences with those thousands of guys! He, He! You’re still ahead of me sexually you brat, but I’ll catch up one day, even if it takes 20 years. Always, Julia”

“Hey sweetiepie, Once Mick Jagger and Little Richards went to have sex, but Rob Thomas and Mrs. Russell were married. [note: Rob Thomas endures] So along came the Supervixen Jeni and saved Rob Thomas and they had sex forever and ever. Love you lots!  Frankie aka Ms. DeeVyne”

“Flash, If I leave you with anything, its this: ‘keep Sonny and Cher inside their house!’ [Sonny and Cher are the names of my boobs] I’m glad we’re still able to be friends after all this time. Be sure to call me this summer. Have a great summer! Always, Brooke”

“Jeni, Hello you psycho chick. Man alive am I glad I met you! I don’t think I’ll ever forget your porno ways for a long time. I’ll have to go to therapy for a really long time, but I’m glad you were in the class I just happened to go into. Your acting skills are amazing. Follow your heart even if it does lead to Brad Renfro. Good Luck with the next 2 years. Stephanie”

“Jeni, I’m glad to have known you for these past two years, even though you scare me sometimes and you are a bit gullible [what?!!?]. Call me this summer so we can get in trouble again [we got in pretty big trouble]. Alicia”

“Jeni, I’m so glad to have gotten to know you this past year and half. You’re always so happy and cheerful [I swear it says that]. Thanx for all the rides you’ve given me [it's how I got friends-my car] and for all the stories you’ve told me, although they were nasty, they were entertaining. And one more thing, try to keep your clothes on, you shouldn’t be giving people that kind of show for free! Just kidding! You know I love you! Oh well, see you later. Mari”

“Jeni, I have 3 words for you DRUGS, SEX, AND ROCK!! You are one awesome chick. Stay the way you are, down as phuc. I hope your summer will be as fuct as mine. Have lots of sex, do lots of drugs and make a few pornos! Keep on flashin’ em! Lindsay”

“Jed-i!! Party hardy, rock n’ roll, chug a 40, smoke a bowl. To all you losers who think your cool, think again ’cause I RULE! Nikole”

“Flash, Well this year went by in a FLASH! But I guess I can’t alter time, but I’m not gonna whine-hey! that rhymed! J/K Well, I’m glad we met cause it’s been a crazy ride knowing you. Even though you bagged on me at the time and shit and used to make fun of my fuckin’ limp [THAT should be the next video blog!]. It’s Forest Gimp [I'm SO clever] to say you’re still cool or is it Foreskin? Well, you make me laugh and I respect you cause your down to earth. Good luck in the future, I know you will go far[aw, from the guy that gave me my first pearl necklace. Sweet]! You know what you want so stick with it and stay true and real and you will succeed in life. 1st was cool, but now I have no classes with you. Well, you’re just gonna have to visit me in Cruces or somethin’. Hope to see you over the summer. Good Luck! Jesse P.S. What’s up with a 3some and porno pics? ‘Condoms for all and no dicks will fall’ [good saying] P.P.S. Tell your mom I said HI P.P.P.S Keep the Angels together”

So then there’s that. As I was reading that last one, I decided that the story of that guy should be the next video blog. I’m really just here to amuse myself. Y’all are innocent bystanders.

What have we learned? In high school, all I talked about was sex and I liked to show my boobs.

I wonder what’s changed. . . . . .