Heidi, Tim and I went bowling on Friday night. I really love bowling. However, I am REALLY bad at bowling. Really bad. Observe:
Generally, when we bowl, we go to nice places. The kind that let you chose which players get bumpers. I always get bumpers. I can bowl a 50 with bumpers. I’m that good. This place wouldn’t let me have bumpers because I was over 12. They didn’t understand that I really needed those bumpers.
My other secret to bowling is being funny. I am a horrible bowler. My only option is to make people laugh. I don’t just mean my friends-I’ve already bought their love. I mean the people in the lanes surrounding us who watch me and are horrified by my bowling skills. I need them to know that I know I suck and it’s hilarious. I spend most of my bowling time drinking beer and being hilarious. It works.
In any case, we recorded a short video on Friday of each of us bowling. In my defense, I chose 20 minutes of sleep vs. washing my hair and I had to wear a lot of make-up to compensate for my bad hair.
As you can see, my bowling skills are second to none. And yet, I don’t mind sharing with the world.
Your welcome.
LOL This is why I LOVE you!!! lol
You know, that move could actually work if you were a bit more to the right of the lane, like almost over the gutter.
My worst bowling moment: The bar that comes down in front of the pins before resetting or whatever kept malfunctioning and I was bowling terribly as it is. It was like, every turn that can go wrong, went wrong. So for this turn, I simply rolled the ball down the middle like how kids do…legs spread, bend over, hold ball with both hands, and roll ball…well, I guess I was taking too long and the bar came down and the ball ended up hitting the bar and rolling allllllllll the way back to us. As soon as I saw the bar come down, I threw my hands up in despair and turned so I didn’t notice the ball coming back until it was at the starting line. Plus, everyone was laughing hysterically and then I was too pissed to even deal with it, so it just kept rolling all the way (like to behind where Tim was sitting). The group next to us were staring at us like we were lunatics – meanwhile I’m with a grouchy face and everyone in my group with tears in their eyes from laughing. Yeah. I love bowling too!
I LOVE your approach to the lane! I picture you riding a horse, bowling ball in one hand, riding crop beating horse flank with the other.
I’m a sucky bowler too. It’s fun to get the kiddie 6 pound balls and just sling the shit out of them.