Heading South

I am leaving tomorrow to head home. Home to my sister, my nephews, my mom and my grandparents. I scheduled this trip just before Christmas, because it was unbearable to me to not be with my family for the holidays. I had to have something to look forward to.

I am looking forward to it. I will admit, though, to feeling queasy at the thought of Joe and I in the same city, breathing the same air. So close and yet, so far. He won’t be there the whole time I’m there-he’s heading to Salt Lake for the weekend. There will be moments, though. Moments we’ll be so close together after all this time. Moments wasted. I know at this point I need to wait. Wait, wait, wait. Wait for him to decide.

I’ve never been good at waiting for something I want.

I’m excited, though. I get to meet my mom’s boyfriend for the first time. I will see some dear, old friends. I will eat like it’s my last meal(s). And I will get to soak up my sister and nephews. No plans beyond laughing. There will be a lot of laughing.

It’s just what I need.